At a recent girl’s recreation volleyball tournament a mother was carrying her daughter’s backpack that included a handmade sign warning about the alleged evils of a local volleyball club. 
During the entire tournament the mother sat by herself and did not talk to anyone. As she cheered for her daughter’s team she guarded her backpack and made sure the sign was visible to the entire crowd.
Clearly something went wrong with the relationship between the mother, her daughter, and the club. The purpose of this post is not to place blame on the club or the mother. Rather, the intent is to discuss ways to prevent the type of discord that exists in this situation.
The good news is that the daughter was still playing!
Mismanaged Expectations
The euphoria surrounding the club selection and tryout process may be problematic.
Many club directors are Type A personalities who are passionate about selling volleyball. They have good intentions and want to help young girls enjoy the sport and grow as athletes and individuals. Sometimes they are too passionate and may not accurately represent their club.
At the same time some parents are so excited about seeing their daughter on the court they do not hear or may not understand what the club director has told them. At younger levels many girls played volleyball for the first time in intramurals or their physical education class and want to continue playing when these seasons come to an end. In many parts of the country the next step for them is club volleyball even though the “appropriate next step” may be developmental club programs or strong recreation or short-term league programs.
Despite the good intentions of parents and club directors, in many instances, the problems associated with club volleyball are a case study of mismanaged expectations. In most cases misunderstandings could have been remedied by better communications from both the parents and club directors.
The management of expectations is critical to the future of the sport. It is tragic when girls quit playing volleyball because they are playing in a dysfunctional setting.
A Few Questions Parents Need to Ask
If parents ask the following questions and feel comfortable with the answers, they will increase the chances of having a positive club experience for their daughter.
• Does the club have open house sessions for the parents? Do they have open gyms so the kids can interact with the coaches and potential teammates? Are the instructors at the open gyms “showcase coaches” or will they be the actual coaches for your daughter?
• A key to a successful volleyball experience is playing on a team with a qualified coach who can relate to all of the players. If the coach cannot relate to your daughter then you may not have a good experience. For a variety of reasons, many clubs will not identify coaches prior to the start of the season. They defend this stance by saying, “All our coaches are great, besides you don’t get to pick your teachers when you go to public school, so it really doesn’t matter.” Depending on your perspective this may be a sufficient answer or it may raise a red flag. When people plan to spend $2,500+ for their daughter to play volleyball, they should know who the coach is. Would you buy an appliance, furniture, or used car for that amount without looking at it up close? Who is going to coach your daughter?
• Most club coaches are great people who lack sufficient training to adequately coach the sport for a season that lasts six months. Compensation for most coaches is minimal. Club coaches are required to have background checks. In addition they must pass a four-hour IMPACT training class from the USAV. What are the credentials of the coaching staff beyond these basics? Does the club provide additional training for their coaches? Can you get additional instruction if you do not feel your daughter needs additional instruction outside the club program?
• What is the club’s philosophy? Do they play to win? Is their focus on being a recreational team? Do they believe in on court and off court training? Do they recruit only tall players? What is the coach’s philosophy? As a parent, can you live with the club philosophy and the coach’s philosophy?
• What skills are measured in the tryout? Are the tryouts open or closed? Will the kids find out why they did not make the team? Will the tryouts take into the account the potential of a player or the possible chemistry of the team when making their selections?
• What is the cost for playing on the team? What is included in that fee (uniforms, equipment, travel)? What are the undocumented costs of playing such as family travel to practices and tournaments? Does the club have scholarship programs?
• When are practices? What happens if a player misses practice? Do the players stand in line during practice? Are players punished when they make a mistake? Can parents watch practices? Is conditioning part of practice time or is it separate? Are there club activities other than practice such as film reviews, good will projects in the community, outside training, special seminars, attendance at other matches?
• What is your reason for playing club volleyball? Recreation? Instruction? Camaraderie? College scholarship? Is this club a good fit for your daughter and your pocketbook? Do you have the patience to deal with the parents and your daughter’s teammates – some may become BFFs, while others may be at the opposite end of the spectrum. Is club volleyball appropriate for your daughter? Can parents buy playing time or positions on the team for their daughters?
• When are tournaments? Is playing time guaranteed? How is the starting lineup established?
• Is communications a critical part of the program? What is the role of the parent in communications with the coach? How should the players approach the coach when they have a problem?
Think “Volleyball-A good investment for your daughter.” If you 
answer these and other questions prior to committing with a club or other long-term program, then it is likely the sign you place on your daughter’s backpack would support the general virtues of having your daughter play organized volleyball in an appropriate program.